Affirmations and Goal-Setting – Don’t Confuse the Issue!

Émile CouéAffirmations have been a favourite way to get your thinking producing amazing results for a long, long time. When I first heard of them it was in reference to Émile Coué, the French psychologist.

He introduced autosuggestion to his patients as a means of self improvement. He would have them repeat a mantra every day, several times a day, and it often brought about wonderful results. I still remember the simple, but no doubt very effective phrase he became famous for:

“Every day, in every way, I’m getting better and better.”

You’ve probably heard it too – it’s been repeated and referenced thousands of times.

And affirmations can undoubtedly bring about tremendous changes and improvements. But sometimes they’re not so effective. In fact, sometimes they just don’t hit the mark at all. And you’re left wondering where the hell you went wrong. And maybe even wondering why you bothered wasting your time with affirmations, which were supposed to be so effective, and yet proved to be so totally over-rated.

If this rings a bell with you, let me just offer you a slightly different approach. One of the problems with affirmations is that they tend to be quite stern and unflinching. I mean, when you say to yourself “I will be more confident from now on”, that doesn’t leave much wiggle room, does it? You certainly want that to be the truth, but the fact is it usually goes against the grain.

You want to be more confident, sure, so you say that … but the fact that you lack confidence means you probably don’t believe those very positive words. So you’re trying to force yourself to be more confident! Not gonna work, is it!

A subtle change of wording

Don’t despair – you can still pursue this dream, but with a subtle difference in the wording of your affirmation. Instead of saying (or thinking) “I will be more confident from now on”, try this: “Wouldn’t it be nice if I were more confident from now on.” As soon as you say that, it makes you smile! You can’t help it – there’s just something about that wording. It’s almost bursting with possibilities!